Lions and Gazelles: The new 'Birds and the Bees'?

I was fortunate in avoiding that awkward situation where you turn 'that age', and your parents think you're ready for:

The Sex Talk.

Mine must have thought i was pretty up to date on that sort of thing- or, on the other hand, they may have thought I'd never get to that stage in my teenage years- and, nearing the legal age for clubbing without getting that far, they're probably right.

Anyways. I was told about a discussion some of my friends had earlier on this year about how they view the situation between boys and girls. In this new age view of things, there were no birds. There were no bees. The laws of attraction had evolved in the Animal Kingdom now to Lions and Gazelles. Now I have a pretty crap sense of humour, but this was entertaining to listen to!

The conversation arose from the problem with one of the guys pursuing a girlfriend of mine, and was lectured about how the fun is in the chase. Well, if you were a hunter, would your exhilaration come from the thrill of the pursuit? I thought yeah, I guess. So the Lion, being the stronger, faster, however the lazier of the species, who sleeps approx 22 hours a day- is assigned to the lads. How odd, doesn't sound anything like them?

And the ladies are the Gazelles- sleek, aloof, travel in herds, frolicking around picking daisies and chattering amongst each other.

Now when it comes to deciding which Gazelle the Lion wants, he typically looks for the weakest one in the pack. Perhaps they are slower, younger, older, more toned and meaty, or have a bit more on the side. Or, if they're very determined, he might target the smart, fast ones that are more of a challenge, harder to catch. Every Lion has slightly different taste.

The next move is to separate this gazelle from the pack. Gazelles, like females, are generally inseparable. Its hard to catch them off guard, on their own. But it can be done with a bit of stalking, keeping a low profile or camouflaging, guessing what the gazelle is going to do next. Now Lions have their packs too, and they may use this to help them, to surround the herd and distract them with on another while the Lion zones in on his prey.

When the opportune moment arises, the Lion will pounce. The Gazelle doesn't know what hit her, the monstrous beast came out of no where. Lions can be a real pain in the ass, destroying families or taking a Gazelle away from her little friendship herd. But good things can happen- like Romeo and Juliet, the two enemies that weren't meant to be in love- they seemed to work around that obstacle =)

By now, Gazelles know that they're physically the minority, even though society is equalizing the two in privileges. Do Gazelles have the right to graze on pride lands? Heck yes! In some cases, Gazelles may even have the confidence to approach the Lions, to find a pride of them somewhere on the Savannah and hang around for the thrill of their chase. Gazelles can be complicated.

So, is the era of the birds and the bees coming to a close? What relation did they have to each other, anyway?